I was talking to my friends and we all realised that our parents do some really annoying things, it’s as if these annoying, stupid things are requirements and in the “how to be a parent and piss your child off every day” book.
Because I love a list (I mean, who doesn’t it’s a fabulous system)  I shall be writing all these annoying things in one;

1) being deaf
I don’t know about you guys, but my mum has a tendancy to ask questions, then have an inability to hear my response. She’ll call me into the kitchen and say something like…
“what do you want to drink with dinner?”
“orange and lemonade please”
“can you say that again please I couldn’t hear you?”
“mum, how did you not hear me, I was basically shouting”
to which she’ll reply
“I was boiling the kettle say it again”
WHY WOULD YOU ASK ME A QUESTION, IF YOU ARE BOILING THE KETTLE AND KNOW YOU WON’T HEAR MY RESPONSE? WHAT A WASTE OF TIME. The amount of times I’ve had to repeat myself over and over again because of noisy household appliances is beyond ridiculous.

2) mumbling
We all get those moments where your parents have pissed you off so much you whispser or mumble something to youself like “you’re so deaf” BUT THEY ALWAYS HEAR THE MUMBLE. Do they have selective hearing? Do they ignore you when you’re basically shouting but hear you when you’re mumble?
3) un-answered questions
My mum tends to do this a lot. She likes to ask people questions then either ignore the reply then answer the question herself or says the answer’s wrong. An occassion that sticks out for me is, as I now call it, “the pudding incident.”
She asked me what I wanted for pudding, whether I wanted “sticky toffee pudding” or “chocolate pudding” and I clearly answered with “chocolate please”… and guess what I was given. Yes, that’s right, sticky toffee. Do you know why she’d given me sticky toffee pudding? It’s because it had a closer sell by date and therefore had to be eaten, so she chose to “not hear” my answer.
What is the point? Why ask me which I could have, if I was only allowed a certain one in the first place?!
4) the complaints
Do either of your parents ever ask you to do something then complain about how you’ve done it? They’ve asked you to take the washing in but you’ve “not done it properly because it wasn’t taken upstairs” or they asked you to lay the table but “you haven’t put enough placemats on” but when they have to do the work themselves they tell you you’re selfish.

Do any of you relate? Let me know!


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